My son is different. It's something that I rarely see or think about, but at the same time, Ryan reminds me constantly. Sometimes he's simply standing next to a friend. He's so tiny next to his friends. Or perhaps he's trying to get shoes onto his thick chunky feet. Or, like this particular morning, unlike the rest of the universe, he's putting his pants on TWO legs at a time. Apparently Ryan hasn't gotten the memo that everyone puts their pants on ONE leg at a time. It's that very act that supposedly unifies us all together and reminds us that despite our conflicting opinions, contrasting beliefs and different appearances, we are all the same. Enter Ryan. Yup, he's different.
These moments that remind me of Ryan's difference are continuous. Sometimes the reminders are heart warming and other times they are heart breaking. Our normal is far from the standard. My house is littered with stools, pointers and extensions. And my calendar is booked with numerous specialists year round. I even have a sewing machine - I never thought I would take on the challenge of sewing. When it comes to the creative arts, my mind is always eager, but my output makes Pinterest cringe. At least I've managed to get the hang of hemming pants! After all, Ryan's legs deserve some daylight just like anyone else's.
Of course, it's no surprise that Ryan's daily life makes his difference stand out. After all, he IS different. And his difference is in plain site. All. The. Time. No matter where we go, it's clear that Ryan is little. It's obvious that he is different. There's no blending in for Ryan. He's exposed no matter what he wears, says or does. Whether we want it or not, Ryan's dwarfism is part of who he is. After all, it's the first thing a person sees when meeting him. I hate the fact that this sometimes means that he will be judged before he's even said "hello". And other times he may be teased just for how he looks. These are the heartbreaking moments.
But Ryan overshadows the heartbreak. On a daily basis I'm reminded how our differences are what make us awesome. Ryan is the smallest kid in his class. But he's also the loudest. And he's actually looked up to. If you can believe that! His confidence and love for life is sought after by his friends. And when it comes to his hurdles, he's always finding new and inventive ways to get it done. And he's got it done often before I have a chance to realize the possible challenge. Ryan is different alright. And as odd as it may sound, I'm grateful for his difference.
Over the past five years we have celebrated Ryan's special difference. And in a world where people put their pants on one leg at a time, Ryan is being himself and he ROCKS. Sure he has rough times. There are tears, frustration, pain and fear. These emotions are a standard for us. But being different has also benefited Ryan. For starters, he's made me a better mother than I could have ever imagined. And he's learned the value of friendship. Of trust. And of pride. He knows who he is and likes himself. It's unreal.
Apart from himself, Ryan sees the world for what it has to offer. And I've learned to do the same. I've never noticed such beauty in people's appearances, voices and actions. Ryan is in good company when it comes to being different. Sure, being different means more attention. I've never been a headturner myself, but with Ryan in tow we are noticed. I'm not ashamed of the fact that Ryan turns heads. He's short, but he has a smile that spreads like wildfire. If it weren't for Ryan's difference how many people would miss out on a spontaneous midday smile? Would we see all the beauty out there in the world? Yup, being different is something to notice.
Sure, he puts his pants on two legs at a time. But I guess it makes sense. He's ready to go in half the time. And he's definitely a kid that's going places.
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