Like many parents of children with conditions, I never thought that this feeling of content would be possible. Ever since our first Little People of America event, my eyes were opened. I met adults and children that have achondroplasia - just like Ryan does. I heard about their good experiences and their bad ones too. The world doesn't make life easy for a person with dwarfism. The idea of going to school with hundreds of children that were all older and bigger than Ryan scared me. I remember standing at our first LPA event and holding Ryan tighter and tighter. And it hit me. I can't hold and protect him in my arms forever. One day soon I would have to release Ryan from my arms and trust him and those around him. And so our work began.
At first it seeemed easy. My husband and I embraced Ryan's condition and it seemed like enough. Ryan was perfect. His height didn't matter. Until I looked forward. Ryan would need more than a mother's love to handle school, friendship, work, love ... life. He would need self acceptance and love for himself. He'd need confidence. And he'd need thick skin and a sense of humor too. Challenge accepted. It was time for me to get Ryan ready for life as a little person. He had just five years to understand and accept his difference. To learn how to stand up for himself and to handle negativity that would surely come his way. All of this starting before he even knew how to talk. But I knew he could handle it. He had to.
It's easy to think that Ryan is just a happy kid. For starters, he is a happy kid. But it's not entirely "just the way he is". And he's in good company with other kids that have conditions. Having a disability takes a lot of work. And boy has Ryan worked. Five years flew by and were filled with endless pep talks and information about dwarfism. I came up with the phrase "Little Big" helping Ryan understand that though he is little, he can do big things and he can be big. He attended tons of LPA events and met other kids just like him. And at the same time, Ryan was immersed in the world of average height friends at school. He learned how to stand in line, write and follow directions. But more importantly, he developed his sense of self. He realized his difference while also making friends. He learned that the two can go together. His thick skin began to develop. Over the course five years he experienced life as a friend. As a student. As a baseball player and swimmer too. He did it all. He did it with stools. Hemmed pants. Doctors appointments and adaptations. But he did it. He experienced life as a little person. Phase one of a billion complete. We have a lot more work ahead. But today we celebrate.
I'm so proud of Ryan. And I'm proud of myself too. I set the bar high. I pushed him out of his comfort zone. He had to adapt, find his voice and learn patience. I'm his biggest cheerleader and his drill sergeant. And after all of our work, Ryan has risen to the challenge and is ready for Kindergarten. Ryan is ready for Kindergarten because he's worked for it. He's ready for Kindergarten because he's freaking awesome. And most important of all, he's ready for Kindgarten because I realized that even though I have to physically let go of my boy, as long as he loves himself, my embrace will last forever.
